I can't help feeling that I made a stupid decision to move my Baileyi from the tank she's been so happy in, to the one tank that's upstairs. Since moving her, she's not eaten at all -- but that isn't unusual because she often sulks after being moved. But thing is, before the move, she was just starting to eat better for me, which made me happy. I didn't worry too much about her not eating, she's gone a week or more before ... so it didn't seem a problem.
I went into the room where her tank is this morning and I knew just by looking at her that something wasn't right. Her colour was off and normally she looks at me. Her eyes weren't moving, nor were her gills. I knew she was dead! I reached into the tank and picked her up and sure enough, she was dead.
It hit me really badly and I burst out crying. I had her longer than any of my other puffers and I felt she was special (at least to me). I often joked about her being a bald Baileyi because she had very little hair on her.
I blame myself for her death, I should never have moved her. I feel utterly and totally guilty and feel as though I killed her. I just can't believe she's dead. And to add to that, my husband just expected me to act as if everything was normal. Thankfully he's gone to work tonight, so I can cry to my heart's content.
I just really feel upset because earlier in the week I rehomed Obie my Fahaka, and even though that was for the best, I cried and cried over him going. So now I really feel gutted. Sort of lost 2 puffers in one week, even though Obie has gone to a better home (hopefully).
The chances of finding another Baileyi aren't very good and I just can't help feeling to blame for Bab's dying. Strange how a fish can make you cry, but indeed they can. I've cried over a few since I've kept puffers, and I suppose I will do more crying in the future at some point.
All my photos of Babs the Baileyi are on my other computer, the one that died and we're not sure how to get them off there, if they can be gotten off. I had one photo in my user gallery, and not a very good one.
Babs -- You will be deeply missed. 
