The Most Ridiculous...

[Infinity8]

So, after working in a major chain of pet stores for about a year, I found myself continually amazed at the ridiculousness that comes out of people's mouths when fish/pets are involved. Anyone have a good groan or laugh?

Favorites of mine while I worked in the fish department:

"Do y'all make freshwater clownfish?"

Customer: "I need food for my fish." (keep in mind this is a grown woman)
Me: Okay. What kind of fish are we talking about here?
Customer: Well, it's silver and goes back and forth.
Me: Uh-
Customer: And it swims really fast.
Me: ...that narrows it down to about thirty species we carry...

Customer: (on the phone) So I gots a question. (I live in a redneck region)
Me: Alright...shoot.
Customer: So I got dem der turtles in a ferty gallon cuz mah kids love the Ninjer Turtles or sumethin. I got two. Now, I don't want them havin' babies. What can I do?
Me: *i list several options, mostly vet based, including separating them and taking out the eggs. My turtle knowledge is limited"
Customer: yeah, yeah, that's fine, but when am I gonna know if they wanna breed? When's the female gonna get her period?
Me: ..............turtles....lay...eggs.

and recently...
My landlord's secretary: He's a bit confused on what you're asking regarding this fish tank.
Me: Alright. (I rattle off the details of Feather's tanks and my concerns about weight, water damage, our lease terms, ect)
Secretary: So it's a 20 gallon fish tank?
Me: Yes.
Secretary: And there will be fish in it?
Me: ........yes. (no, I'm going to bathe in it)

anyone else?

[hadla]

Rotfl "make" freshwater clown fish XD only one I can think of right now is the guy at this tiny lfs insisting that all puffers need salt and argued with me over it! Guess who isn't going to give them any business!